Greatest Game No One Knew Took Place

In a surprise clash of the Titans where one team was 1 game over .500, one of the greatest fantasy playoff battles this league has ever known went down. It was a first-round square off between the Magical Unicorns and JohnClaytonsPonytail. The soiree ended 95.98 to 94.72 with the Magical Unicorns getting the right to advance in the bracket. But this would be one of those proverbial "much closer than the score indicates" games.
It all started last Thursday night. JCPT's Pierre Garcon has an amazing night catching 2 TD passes and jumps his master out to a 18.15 lead. Somewhere between this point and Sunday the white hefty bag that sat atop the Metrodome, you know, the one that Minnesottans thought could support a Northern winter, collapes and drops too much snow for the Sunday slated game between the Vikings and Giants, forcing it to be moved to Monday night. This rare circumstance only ratchets up the drama that would happen the very next night to immeasurable levels.
Heading into Monday night, the score was Maigical horny horses 61.73- JCPT 64.03. Here is the kicker, along with JCPT's 2 point lead, he also has 4 players going against the Magical Horny Horses 2. Baltimore defense, Mario Manningham, Arian Foster, and Ryan Longwell vs. Andre Johnson and Ahmad Bradshaw. This lead and those remaining players makes this lead seem insurmountable. Not so fast my friend.
Cue batshit crazy happening number one. After 297 straight career starts, Favre quits leaving Ryan Longwell's kicking possibilities in the inept hands of knee-knocker Tavaris Jackson. T-Jack manages to take out their starting RB and sitting out a few plays limiting Longwell's production to an abysmal 3 points. Kicker Neutralized.
Also in this game is Ahmad Bradshaw representing the MU. In the second quarter Bradsaw has a run that appears to have him go into the endzone only to have the guys in Foot Locker uniforms rule him down just short of the goal line. Next play, Big Black Behemoth Brandon pounds in the remaining 1 yard for the score. This apparent touchdown stolen from Bradshaw's owner costs him 6 points. Surely he would need all the help he could get to overcome the adversity he was faced with heading into the Monday night double-header.
Now over to the game where the real drama unfolded. Simple breakdown of why this game was so important. One team has the Texans biggest offensive threat, the other has the Raven's defense. Ravens start out crushing the red clad Texans and jump out to a 21-0 lead. Shutout intact, Andre Johnson rendered meaningless. 42 seconds to go in the half and the lifeless Texans manage to somehow get Andre Johnson behind the Raven's homeless safety and he scores a 46 yard touchdown. A huge lift going into the break, double whammy, big points for Johnson, negative points for Ravens' D. Could the gap be closing?
Once again, cue the Corso catch phrase. After halftime, the Ravens receive the kickoff and after 29 missed tackles, the ball is matriculated 103 yards down the field for a special team touchdown. In your face Andre Johnson, your score has now been washed. The game continues to progress with no big happenings taking place. Keep in mind that JCPT has Arian Foster, the league's leading rusher, sad part is that after all the smoke clears he turns out to be a non-factor.
Fast forward to 21 seconds left in the game. MU is now down by 1 point and needing a miracle from his only remaining player, Andre Johnson. After a pass that may have been intended for Jacoby Jones is caught in the back of the endzone by Mr. Johnson, 6 points and change are added to the herd of mythical equine and 3 points are taken from JCPT after his defense goes from the 21-27 point range to the 28-34 point range. This one play resulted in a 9 point swing. For those of you who don't feel like doing the math. The Corns are up about 8 points now. Since I knew what was at stake and my team had secured a 1st round bye because I'm awesome, I immediately started contemplating what it would take for this lead to be erased. The only two options left were Arain Foster and the Baltimore defense. Texan's get the ball back around their own 10 in overtime. Play one, incomplete pass. Play 2, Shaub drops back and throws a pick 6. 7 points for the owner of the Raven's defense!!! Could it be, after letting the MU back into the game the most improbable of all comebacks had happened. Nope, wait for it, it wasn't enough. JCPT comes up 1point short with all the lead changes coming in the final minutes of the fantasy week.
Epic.

Keeping the Buzz Alive

In an attempt keep their fans' interest piqued in the winter months, a lot of Major League Baseball clubs have come up with a few ideas to keep their teams in the spotlight year round. From documentaries to game shows and everything in between, fans get a look a little deeper into the lives of their favorite players in a few of these interspective pieces. I personally hope this sort of thing catches on because I enjoy seeing the real side of the people that have become drone-like creatures when a news camera is in front of them. Below are a few of the ideas that some of the more progressive clubs are marketing currently.

White Sox: “Juan and Dunn”. A reality show based on a the comedy that ensues when a fat white man from Texas shares a studio apartment with a skinny black kid from Louisiana. Set against the back drop of racism in the South

Phillies: “Roys will be Roys”. A documentary chronicling the joint venture between Roy Halladay and Roy Oswalt into the cutthroat market of crystal serving containers, the name of their company, Ace Pitchers

Nationals: “A Desmond in the Rough”. After star pitcher Stephen Strasburg couldn’t stay healthy long enough for a simple magazine article to be written about him, hot newcomer Ian Desmond was chosen as the title character in this piece. Catch-phrase from the error prone shortstop, “I play defense with my bat”

Rangers: “Line or Liquid”. Contestants are forced to choose between 2 answers, Line or Liquid, in this fun for all ages game show. In each round contestants are provided with everyday household items and they have to decide if it would be better to inject or snort that item. They write their answer on a tablet to see if they can match the two-man panel of experts consisting of Ron Washington and Josh Hamilton. Winner gets free fore-arm flame tattoos and a Kornheiser afro-puff.

Athletics: “Braden does Dallas: Dirty Sheets edition”. Sexcapade in which pitchers Dallas Braden and staff veteran Ben Sheets travel to the city of Dallas, Texas where the two of them chronicle their efforts to see who can shred the most trim in the offseason. Content not suitable for all viewers.